How to manage differences in religious beliefs in a relationship - National | francinebavay.info
Feb 10, Religious compatibility isn't a top-of-mind concern for many The religious beliefs partners bring to a relationship affect how conflicts play out. May 17, But that doesn't mean dating someone of a different religion doesn't are often surprised when they find out that our differing beliefs—I am. Feb 3, The problem of not getting along over religious differences is really all about big egos. or holding them to your religious tenets, the relationship isn't likely to go well. Just as God works through other people, so does the powers of .. Finding things in common is the best advice given as “We Are All.
What are my expectations for the relationship and a prospective family? How do we express our emotions? Then, talk about these cultural differences as a couple.
7 Ways To Make Interfaith Relationships Work
Many interfaith couples will start negotiating what religion they want their kids to be, for instance, without having a clear idea of their own identity. So self-exploration is key! Crohn tells the story of an Italian Protestant woman who converted to Judaism. Her Jewish husband came home from work surprised to see her reading the Torah. Think about your religious identity and your cultural identity when you were five years old, 12, 18 and today. Crohn suggests journaling your responses.
Crohn says that this is OK. Doing so allows a greater understanding of your partner. For instance, you might attend church or synagogue with your partner.
The Bible itself presents us with a complex mixture of prohibitions against interfaith marriages, acceptance of interfaith marriage under some circumstances, major figures such as Solomon who violated that prohibition and were pulled away from God, and other major figures such as Joseph and Moses who married foreign wives and continued steady in their faith in God.
In short, the Bible presents us with the pluses and minuses of interfaith marriage, and requires us to use our judgment in considering whether to marry someone who does not share our faith.
And the primary issue from a Biblical perspective is whether this marriage will help or hurt our faith in God. How important is your faith to you?
For some people, religious faith is a major part of their lives. For others, it is more of a side issue. How important is it to you that your partner shares your faith? These are questions you and your partner must ask yourselves if you do not share the same faith. Are you willing to have your partner, or your spouse, not share in beliefs and experiences that are a key ingredient of your life?
The Apostle Paul raises the possibility that your husband or wife might, in time, come to share your faith. Ten or twenty years later, you may find yourself living with someone who still does not share your beliefs, and with whom you still cannot share some of your deepest and most important thoughts, feelings, and experiences.
If your faith is very important to you, and forms a core part of your life, I would suggest thinking very carefully before tying yourself to someone who does not share your faith. If, on the other hand, your faith is more of a side issue, and your main focus is on other things, such as career, service, humanitarianism, ecology, or political action, a difference in faith between you and your partner may not be such a big issue.
Of course, from my perspective as a spiritual teacher, God and spirit are at the core of human life—and it is best to share that with your partner. But only you can discern and decide what your core values are, and whether you share them with your partner.
As a general rule, I would suggest that before you commit yourself to someone, and especially before you tie the knot with him or her, make sure the two of you see eye to eye on your core values and on your morals, ethics, and goals in life. If the two of you are pulling in two different directions, and those two different directions reflect different core values and goals in life, it is only a matter of time before your relationship gets torn apart. If you do share core values even though your religious faith is different, then as long as the two of you are able to bridge that gap in faith, the relationship might just work after all.
Fundamentalist, moderate, or mystical? Another reality to consider is that there is a wide variety in the types of faith people have. Though there is infinite variety along this scale, the overall dynamics relating to interfaith marriages are fairly clear: Fundamentalists and evangelicals will have the hardest time being married to someone who does not share their faith. Moderates will generally find it easier to be married to someone who does not share their faith. People with broad and mystical spiritual perspectives will have the easiest time being married to someone with a different spiritual perspective.
Of course, this assumes that each is married to someone who falls in the same part of the scale. For example, a fundamentalist Christian marrying a fundamentalist Muslim is a recipe for disaster. How can you really be married to someone whom you believe is going to hell, or is an infidel? However, moderate Jews, Christians, Muslims, and people of other faiths commonly marry one another and have good and loving relationships.
If either if you leans toward the fundamentalist or evangelical end of your religion, and you belong to different religions or churches, that is a serious red flag. If one or the other does not convert, that relationship is headed for disaster.
If your partner is pressuring you to convert to his or her faith, that is also a serious red flag. Relationships must be based on mutual respect. What about marrying an atheist or agnostic? What about if you are a believer and your partner is an atheist or an agnostic? This, too, is a personal decision. Once again, how important is your faith to you?
How important is it that your partner share your faith, or at least be sympathetic to and supportive of your faith? Clearly a relationship between a hard atheist and a committed Christian, Muslim, or Jew, or to a strong adherent of one of the other faiths, is going to face a rocky road.
Please do not go into the relationship thinking that your partner will come around to your viewpoint in time. A lifetime of pressure to change is a very long time to be stressed out.
It is a recipe for conflict and eventual breakup. If, and only if, you can imagine the two of you together after ten, twenty, thirty, or more years, still believing as you do now, then you may have the basis for a lasting relationship. Keep in mind that mutual respect is a key part of any relationship that works.
What about the children?
Orders placed with the waiter, they each take a deep breath, ready to dive into a new line of conversation. If this scenario seems unlikely, it's because it is. Even during the contentious presidential election, people preferred political conversations to religious ones. Six in 10 U. Religious compatibility isn't a top-of-mind concern for many relationship seekers, who are often more focused on finding someone who likes the same television shows or outdoor activities.
7 Ways To Make Interfaith Relationships Work
Only 44 percent of Americans say shared religious beliefs are very important for a successful marriage, compared to 66 percent who say having shared interests, 63 percent who say a satisfying sexual relationship and 62 percent who say sharing household chores, Pew Research Center reported in October. But while avoiding deep discussions about the value of prayer or arguments over the pope's latest proclamation may seem expedient on the dating scene, couples can struggle in the long term if they don't discuss faith from the start, according to recent research on religion and romance.9 Problems in Atheist / Religious Relationships
The religious beliefs partners bring to a relationship affect how conflicts play out and the faith lives of their future children. Drawing on shared beliefs Religiously matched couples can draw on resources that would not exist without that spiritual bone during times of conflict or stress.