Feb 28, For any man who's a husband, there's a good chance you've upset your wife at some point. For some of you, it was just this morning. And at. Apr 27, Ten Secrets to a Successful Marriage is a great article, that I summarized below about the secrets of a successful marriage. 1. Happiness is not the most. Nov 17, This should be required reading for every husband and wife (or you are accountable for the part you play in the relationship — good or bad.
Practice honesty, even when you're ashamed. If you have maxed out a credit card or two and find yourself hiding the bills each month, you can bet it's going to come back to bite you. Eventually, whether you're applying for a home loan or simply talking about the costs of summer vacation, these kinds of money issues will either be brought to light by a credit report or by the simple fact you can't afford a trip away.
Although infidelity usually happens in bed, it also can happen with money. And it will be a tough road gaining back your spouse's trust if you've lied about overspending. Along that same vein, if you feel you aren't connecting with your partner the way you used to, you need to say something -- now.
I've learned this lesson the hard way.How to Prevent Arguments With Your Husband or Wife (Tips To Avoid Marriage-Killing Conflicts)
I once let communication issues fester for months on end, failing to verbalize my displeasure, and my husband and I wound up in marriage counseling for nearly a year. It took a third party -- and a real investment on our part -- to get us back on track.
If I had not kept telling myself that things would get better on their own, we might not have reached what I call the danger zone. Take care of your appearance. With many years and a few kids under your belt, it's easy to let your appearance slide.
11 Ways To Make Your Long-Term Marriage Happier, Starting Today | HuffPost
Think about when you first met your partner. Would you have walked around in stained sweatpants and without brushing your teeth? My guess is no. I'm not saying you have to look like Julianne Moore every time you settle in for a night of TV. Sometimes my husband will say "wow, you look nice" as I'm walking out the door for a girls' night out.
At least pay your spouse the same courtesy you do your friends by fixing yourself up for him or her every once in awhile. Foster relationships outside your marriage. I've been going on girls' trips for as long as I've been married. Yes, I love traipsing off with my spouse and three kids.
But these weekends away with friends are also important.
Swapping stories with others and enjoying new experiences make me -- I hope -- a more interesting person for my spouse to be around. When Katie Couric asked Barbra Streisand the secret to her happy year marriage to James Brolin, she replied "time apart. Your marriage should be your primary relationship -- but it needn't be the only one.
There are many things you should never say to a longtime spouse, the first being: It's also never a good idea to start a sentence with: We hopefully all have a pretty good sense of ourselves at this point and having someone you love point out a failing in this way does little to engender a loving relationship.
Neither of these is true. If you start a sentence with these words your mate is certain to shut down or start a fight. Stop for a minute and think about what you really mean to say -- and then say that instead. Put away the jumper cables yourself. In life, there are big things and there are little things.
The big things -- draining the bank accounts to support a gambling habit, forgetting to mention that he's in the federal witness relocation program living under a false identity or that he has a second family stashed in Queens -- are of course one-way streets to divorce court.
But most of us don't have problems of that magnitude. Most of us have problems that are more like petty and repeated annoyances, which when fed the steroids of resentment and anger, balloon up like Arnold Schwarzenegger. And we all know what steroids did to his heartright?
Most of our problems start out small enough -- he borrows the jumper cables from your car and then leaves them sitting in the driveway just waiting to get run over -- and from that sprouts a giant festering sore.
It leads you to utter words like, "If you loved me you would have put the jumper cables back in my car so that when I get stuck in a bad neighborhood with a dead battery I could save myself," which, in my household, generally results in a reply like "When do you ever drive in bad neighborhoods?
For a happier marriage, address them right away and keep it simple. Sometimes the best way to address a problem is to just walk away from it -- as in seriously let it go. Not every slight must be addressed.
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Know that not every insult is intended. Practice letting go as much as you can. Bite your tongue until the tip bleeds. And once in a while, remind yourself of why you married this person. Focus on those reasons and let stuff pass without mention.
Whatever yours may be, make sure your wife and you agree. And then ground your marriage in those beliefs, as well. One thing we are good at as men is being confident in our careers. And confident husbands are considered sexy by their wives.
Be confident in how you love her, provide for her, and support her in your marriage, too. No man is perfect.
11 Ways To Make Your Long-Term Marriage Happier, Starting Today
Therefore, no husband is perfect — no matter how good of a husband he is. Take inventory of your strengths, weaknesses, bad habits, and unrealistic expectations of marriage. Be a student of love. Having a fulfilling and happy marriage comes from the ability to first be a student of what your spouse needs to feel loved, appreciated, respected, and supported.
And know that learning this is a life-long experience. Listen to her and her needs with the intent to understand her on a deeper level and become a better lover. Your marriage will improve, as a result. Be a teacher of love.
Conversely, you need to communicate to your wife what things you need, in order to feel loved, appreciated, respected, and supported. Although she may be great in a lot of ways, she will need you to tell her what you need in this marriage. Opening these lines of communication — and having talks sometimes difficult ones — will increase your marital bliss for years to come.
Develop your emotional vocabulary. She'll be forever grateful and feel closer to you when you're able to "speak her language", as a result. But prioritizing does mean that every decision you make about your life i. Still be true to yourself, but also be aware of the deeper consequences your choices will have before you act on them.
In marriage, the only things that are his and hers separately are the wedding rings. Life stresses, mental health challenges, substance abuse issues, financial stresses, difficult kids, etc. So communicate your struggles and challenges openly with your wife, so that you both can face them head on as team. After all, with unity comes power. Date her all over again. Keep your spark — and her passion and admiration for you — alive by continuing to court her long after your wedding date.
Just like you have passion for your favorite sports team or favorite video game, show some passion about being a great husband.