8 Big Relationship Dos and Don'ts | HuffPost Life
Dos and Don'ts For Keeping The Peace In A Relationship I've been in a committed relationship for nearly 15 years, and while we are both still alive, I wouldn't. Marc and Angel Chernoff have spent over a decade coaching clients and helping them build healthy, lasting relationships. On their blog site, Marc and Angel. These are the ultimate do's and don'ts of new relationships And on a more serious note, one of the telltale signs of an abusive partner is them.
What's worse is that their insecurities and negative tendencies lead them to act in ways that destroy what could be a perfectly healthy relationship.
Different partners draw out of us different emotions -- some we didn't even know we had -- and sustaining a relationship becomes tedious from both ends.
Practice these 8 relationship dos and don'ts to fortify your romance with harmony, stability, and joy: Do develop emotional intimacy: Many couples live together physically but live apart emotionally. Emotional intimacy is knowing what your partner needs before they even get a chance to ask.
- 8 Big Relationship Dos and Don'ts
It is picking up on their feelings as if they were your own. Develop a sense of emotional intimacy by being honest with your partner and sensitive to their needs. Do plan a life together: Our plans may not always work out, but envisioning a future with our partner inspires us to take the right steps towards manifesting our long-term goals.
Talk about the years ahead and form a strategy to achieve the things you want together: Do bring them comfort: Your partner wants to come home to love, not to a headache.
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Make your home a place that always reels your partner back because they feel safe, stable, and nurtured. Don't start talking about your problems as soon as your partner walks through the door. The bills, the job, the argument you just had this morning--these things can wait until the atmosphere is calm and appropriate for such a conversation. Do act in the right time: Time can be your biggest enemy or your best friend.
At any given moment, time is either on your side or against you. The wisdom is to recognize when you should act versus when you should wait. If you listen to your inner voice, you can decipher the different tides of time.
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Don't obligate your partner to do things in a certain amount of time, like pushing them to get married within a year. This is your notion of time, not theirs. Do take the big step forward when you're both in complete agreement, even if it takes a bit longer than you'd like. Don't play on their weaknesses: Every day, you have the choice to play on your partner's weaknesses or to reiterate their strengths. If you constantly bring up what they're doing wrong, they'll never feel motivated to do anything right.
No relationship can improve under such negative energy.
There are gentle ways to get your partner to understand what they should be doing differently, and constantly scolding them is not one of these methods. No matter what your partner has done or however they've wronged you in the past, don't retaliate or act in bad faith. Keep your personal karma clean by always treating the other person the way you'd like to be treated, regardless of the way they behave towards you.
This is your duty to yourself and not to anyone else. Do allow yourself to be vulnerable. The only way to emotionally connect with someone fully is to let them into every part of who you are. The healthiest relationships are with people who understand vulnerability is not a weakness.
If you want them to be more spontaneous are you adding security to the relationship that they can. If you want them to be put a little more effort into the physical aspects of your relationships are you building their confidence up and making them feel like the most attractive person that they can confidently do something different.
Do give each other space when you need it. Let them have their Saturday is for the boys day without checking on them. Let her go out as late as she wants to on a Friday with her girlfriends. Do help them to achieve their goals.
Push them to get to where THEY want. The best way to achieve anything is having at least one person know you can. Maybe there are things they can improve on that would make you happy. Do help them to feel secure.
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Be honest with them even if that honesty might hurt. The truth always has a way of coming out and when it does, if you tried to hide it, it hurts the person even more. Build them up in every way you can. Your relationship together is supposed to be the healthiest relationship you each have.
Still, go to the gym. Still, take care of yourself. And you have to take care of yourself, not for them but because you deserve to be your best self-standing next to them. Do build relationships with their family. Your trust issues have nothing to do with them. Open up to them about it so they understand but DO NOT lose your shit on them because you have things in your past that has left you insecure.
Do meet them halfway. When fighting we wary of the ammo you use.
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No matter how angry you might be remember you do care about this person and that anger will fade but the things you say while angry can only be forgiven not forgotten. Do build them up. Do pretend to be a little bit interested in the things they care about.